15/ 01/ 2011

based on the title it's about me and what happen to that day. 


that day is mixed up with bad and happy mode. and let me say, most of it i think it's bad. very very bad. ughh!!


the happy mode is when i get a text that my boyfriend coming to my house with izwan. i can't say bad things about izwan. later he won't bring my kekasih. hehee. izwan is a nice person but my boyfriend is nicer. and i forget to tell izwan. IZWAN!! MAKSEH MBAK ZUL K RUMAH!!started my day by looking at his face. :)


wan!! ko ada? xda. hihih. ku jak ada wan. neyhh. I LOVE SCOOTVILLE COMMUNITY MEMBER, AYANG, FAMLIY ANG KENGKAWAN. ;D


bad day? don't get me started. ugh!!


just let me say. it's getting worst and worst. and i barely can't stop my tears from coming down. i got crushed. my heart were torn. my anger can't be control. my mouth can't be stop.


i say shit, i say fuck i say all those shit, because there's no other word to describe how am i feeling. ugh!! 


i feel like crying, i feel like smoking, i feel like running away and lastly and i feel like crying. ugh!! 


but i could turn back times, the could be great. i though by seeing his face, making my day better. but it getting worst. i love him. but, do he know?


for my add mate class, ugh. i feel like slapping my teacher face just to shut her up. i'm headache, i'm sick. i don't know what else to do.


i wish i could turn back times. what the use of i'm crying for them, but they don't care. ugh!!


continued i don't know when. i don't feel well. -.-

i don't care

like my sister say to me, what for i angry in this blog. people read also getting bored. 


i want to share a few stories with you guys. :)


i know this guy i don't know since when. but he says he saw me and he immediately attractive to me. he looked for me n bla bla. i'm trying to believe him. but my guts n my head tells me differently. hey, everyone is an actor. thats why we have nick names. :P neyhh. 


this person really a good actor. wanna know why he's a good actor? hey, i know my it's my fault. but asked him. do he know his mistakes towards me? and i keep my mouth shut because i know its my fault. as if i care much bout him lately. after the breaking up scene, he looked for me. what?? 


who's looking for who jerk? i'm easily to forget you because you asked for it. for my whole life, i never find this kind of boy. why? yes, he loves me and what so ever. but after break up, the bad things happen. like? he this this, he that that. he tells everyone. but, he asked me not to tell everyone. i'm not that kind of girl. 


i know i'm bad playing your heart. but do you know yours? what past let it pass. yes, you might think easy for me to say because i found someone else. but, being someone else is not making the memory disappear. the memories still there in fact. i'm not gonna hate you. but you will hate me.


what for i hate you because of my mistakes. i know, and i realize it. but did you realize yours? why in the first place you asked me to change my relationship status and also asked me not to text you in a few days. what the fuck is that mean.


if you wanna break up, just say it. thats why. to me, making a promise to someone is very very hard. but to you, its easy. you saying the b word with this and that. if you wanna break up, so break up. so mad to me a few days. i asked, you said its nothing. what am i to you? just a piece of crap?


who mistakes it is? did you even know? i don't care if you hate me or you doesn't wanna talk with me or or see me. i don't even care. i live on earth not just to pleased your heart and your desire mister. and please, i'm begging you. stop angry. happy please. i'm no one to you so why you must be angry with me. i know my mistakes and i know yours.


so lets hush hush okey? what the word i called you BABE? hey, it still in my memory. like i remember every single thing you do to me. you apologize, i accept it. even though hard for to accept it back then. what a day. you know, you stiil not the worst ex i know. you still a good guy. 


and hey, i you do hate me. and i know this one coming, i never accept you as my boyfriend. this type of boy, i really do want to get away from. why in the first place i wanna get to know you but in the same time there's something that hate to see.


fuck. haha. i don't know what else to say. just, leave me alone and let GOD do the works and for you, don's say shit when you don't know shit. okeh? let GOD decide if i get the luck like you do. like people use to say, you play shit you got bad partner. so, work very hard babe. don't lazy. and also learn to accept your own mistake because for me and others are learning. 

THE END

life of a teenage girl

speaking of life, my life just like a ball that get into the middle of no where. sometimes i'm going up, sometimes i'm down. talking about long time no update, i'm busy. like i said 2011 gonna be the rough time i have ever had. and unfortunately it't 110% true. it's rough, it's miserable and it's lack of fun-ness. 


talking about school, like from the first day of school i bring back home homeworks. with a s behind it. i feel like crying at the same time. and lately, i sleep late and congrates to me i'm maybe from bad girl to good girl now. hehe. hey, the same me nothing change. i think. my height don't change and my moody or sometimes happy still there. i'm still a facebook holic. haha. 


today is wednesday, 12/01/2011. i can't even believe that i'm in form 5 now. it feels like i'm still form 4 student. hard for me to let my teenage world at school go. and it's very hard when i'm gonna step out from school and away from my friends. 


why must teenage world hard to fine? stepping outside the school with a license and starting a new life maybe as a worker or a student university and started making new friends. uh, how i'm gonna let my teenage world go. i wish i can turn back times. 


i miss my friend. even though we fight or what ever. we still friends. :) 


i love my friends, :)